BOOK REVIEW : SIDDHARTHA

Hermann Hesse (July 2, 1877 – August 9, 1962) was a German-born Swiss poet, novelist, and painter. In 1946, he received the Nobel Prize in Literature. His best-known works include Steppenwolf, Siddhartha, and The Glass Bead Game (also known as Magister Ludi), each of which explores an individual's search for authenticity, self-knowledge and spirituality. [1]

Siddhartha got published in 1922 and it’s the most famous and influential novel by Nobel prize-winning (1946) German author Hermann Hesse. Though set in India, the concerns of Siddhartha are universal, expressing Hesse's general interest in the conflict between mind, body, and spirit.

Siddhartha, the son of a Brahmin (a Hindu Priest), and his best friend, Govinda, have grown up learning the ways of the Brahmins. Everyone in the village loves Siddhartha. But although he brings joy to everyone's life, Siddhartha feels little joy himself. He is troubled by restless dreams and begins to wonder if he has learned all that his father and the other Brahmins can teach him. Siddhartha’s intentions for the departure depress his father and he strongly refrains him to go and join the samanas. But Siddhartha gets success, at last, in making the Brahmin father realize that this is what he really wants and now there is nothing keeping him away from his chosen destiny . His dear friend Govinda joined him for the never-ending journey.

He leaves with the samanas (ascetics). He learned self-denial, meditation, fasting, and thinking and went through all the difficulties of the forest. He traveled with the samanas. After being with them for a longer time span he realized that they are no different than the Brahmins. Despite of their complete dedication towards the prayers, they are not likely to get eternal salvation. It makes him think of another way, path to follow his goal. Someone could bring his soul the eternal peace and harmony that forever intertwines his being with the truth of salvation. Siddhartha derisively compares the samanas life to an intoxicated, a drunk, who gets a break from the sufferings due to the spiritually soothing ways of samanas.

After 3 years, he hears intriguing rumors regarding a person, Gotama, who having attained enlightenment teaches others the way to peace. The samanas try to refrain them from going, scold them, but with unshakeable nerves and trust, both of them set out to find the “illustrious one”. The sermon of Gotama really impresses Govinda, who later one pledges to his allegiance whereas Siddhartha somehow plans to leave Gotama, his teachings, Govinda and continues with his search. As he continues his journey, he runs into Gotama. He questions Gotama’s doctrine of salvation. In reply Gotama responds that his job is not to explain the world to those who are after knowledge, he just explains the ways to get salvation from suffering.

As Siddhartha leaves, realizes that he has outgrown the need of teachers. But in reality in seeking himself, he only gets success in fleeing from the real Siddhartha. This realization sets him apart from all the previous associations. He was no longer a samana or a Brahmin and he had resisted following his friend Govinda into the discipleship of Gotama. He crosses the river and moves into the town. Siddhartha admits to having no money to pay for the voyage but the ferryman man replies in the friendliest manner and reveals that friendship is no less than a payment to him. In the town he meets a famous courtesan Kamala and insists to become the learner of her art of love. On Kamala’s request he started working for a wealthy merchant Kamaswami. He impresses Kamaswami with his magic of talk, soon starts working for him. He does all that to be closer to Kamala. In the speed of work he forgets the reason of his quest. His relation with kamala started reaching heights. He got so much indulged in drinking, gambling, and music that he started forgetting the inner voice, which could remind him of his quest. He gets richer and starts having the anxiety of a rich person. The soul sickness of the rich crept over him. He notices that he is growing old and mortality factor starts teasing him. He leaves the town, never to return. When kamala learns of his disappearance, she closes her house forever, for the visitors. Soon after that she discovers that she is pregnant with Siddhartha’s child.

Siddhartha goes straight to the river and tries to commit suicide but after hearing the perfect word “om” _for himself_ and manages to completely hold himself from doing so. After that he goes to sleep fully refreshed, discovering, his old friend Govinda sitting beside him. He feels refreshed and happy, as if resurrected. At first Govinda doesn’t recognize him. After knowing the presence of Siddhartha, he gets extremely happy and asks about his life. After some talk Govinda leaves on his pilgrimage.

After that he meets his old companion, ferryman, Vasuveda. Both recognize each other and Siddhartha discloses his entire story to Vasuveda. On day they find out that Gotama is on his deathbed and people are going to be with him in his last moments. That how Kamala’s started her journey to meet Gotama. Accompanied by her child, she came to the river, where a snake unfortunately bit her. Vasuveda came to her help and brought her to the hut where both (Siddhartha and Vasuveda) lived. Now she was on her deathbed. She introduced Siddhartha to his son. He was a young boy of 11. After her death, Siddhartha insisted on keeping the boy with him but the child never respected Siddhartha, His sulky, resentful and wretched behavior always rough pain to Siddhartha, but he never took notice. One day the boy ran away. Siddhartha followed, upon reaching the town, his life in that town came in front of his eyes. He couldn’t stop the boy. He sat, distressful, murmuring Om to himself. Vasuveda reached there soon and took him back to the river. The pain of loosing his son was long lasting but it enabled him, however, to identify with the ordinary people. One day he begins his search for his child but then recalls that how he had left his father.

One day Govinda stops by the river and meets Siddhartha but doesn’t recognize him. When Siddhartha calls him by the name, joy runs through his body after meeting his old beloved friend. Govinda asked for the doctrine on which Siddhartha was living. Siddhartha says that one cannot pass on wisdom, only knowledge. Before leaving he asks Siddhartha for something to help him along the path. Siddhartha suggests him to kiss his forehead. On doing so he sees stream of faces in place of Siddhartha’s. Overwhelmed by this unity and timelessness, Govinda falls to the ground in front of the man whose smile reminded him of everything he had ever loved in his life.

To me Siddhartha is an egoistic and selfish wanderer who trusts his decision so much that it freezes his ability to hear the outer voices, like his father, Gotama and Govinda. His faults and sins are an experience to him, a triumph. All the decisions, whether they lead him to peace or distress were the product of his own closed brain. Siddhartha believes in finding, what and how to find is unclear to him. He left his home at such age in which self-worth makes us feel equal to the most powerful and wise. Learning from experiences and expeditions is very much basic thought and for that leaving home is nothing but stupidity. Siddhartha’s tale is not a tale of discovering, it much more about loosing the reality of his own being. He was never a Brahmin, Samana not even a merchant because he always imitated other; firstly he blindly followed the books and the priests who weren’t even sure of their future. Secondly, he went on a journey with bunch of “so called” scavengers of reality and harmony. Thirdly the reason he forgot all the previous learning and associations because every human grows with time and looses even the unshakeable beliefs. I completely agree with comparison of a drunk with a samana, both loose distresses for a while. But no one guarantee the eternal salvation from the sufferings. So whether you get drunk or meditate, what difference does it make? After reading the story it seems if writer is a puppet of Siddhartha because he is presenting his every act in the most sober and moderate way. Some people might envy Siddhartha for the sufferings, pity him.

its 2nd and Friday......one of the hardest days to pass. it always brings complete tiredness. here at the board office things are going pretty dull and gloomy. just because i am the youngest, doesnt mean im not the dumbest. well as always i dont care about the glares of those who are truly incompetent. the fat chubby guard wasnt at his usual his usual spot so i went straight to my seat and noticed that my squad shifted to a place in corner. well its good in a way that now i can easily text do my work without any sudden suspect ion.

things were going pretty well, until JUMA prayers, a moron came up to me and demanded to leave the premises for JUMA prayers. at first it felt like in all thee days i have been working with some extremists who force their will onto others. well before my speech gets monotonous and emotional, i remember that i told em that " tm nai juma parhana hai" he said " ye yahan ka law hai". This statement made me really really mad. so i said " then show me where its written". now he was looking angry so he actually got furious and said " lagta hai pehli bar marking kar rahay ho" my face gave em an ignorant smile and he started dialing no to his superiors probably and first time in all these years i wanted to have a clash with a person of higher authority.that cuz i wanted to leave the place. i hate being in the company of conservative people. so actually i wanted an excuse to leave the job.

the phone wasnt working so with a puppy look on his face, he asked some of the senior officers to explain the whole system to me in that makes me feel insulted. well that didnt happen cuz those officers told me that it no body stays during juma break cuz it could end give a chance to somebody who wants to create of the system like changing marks, stealing sheets. well i was expecting some fierce reaction but that man looked really humble, after that when he thought that he made me cool, he asked about my previous educational institutions. well undoubtedly i have an impressive history when it comes to my institutions,reflects through my attitude and personality.well i took a break and tried on of the nearby restaurant to eat something , ahhhhhh it was bad.

i returned around 2 and i still had half hour ahead of me to wait. then i saw a teenage girl who actually tried to jump from the sixth floor if she fails the papers. now that was some scene.she was absolutely nuts and then i found out that she was in 9th Grade whose papers werent even touched. i guess she planned the whole thing very early. i returned to the hall......and then work and work

i am glad my squad are good people. 3 ladies and 2 men. well whenever i find a mistake in checking they complain. well its just part of my job. they want to work as much as they can. for me its kinda unacceptable, i keep quality little ahead of quantity. well they have been really nice to me.im glad they are with me otherwise i would have been with some "BABA" ..

here i am again, earlier this evening when i was leaving my seat, i started thinking that "why do they even bother to take the exams". yeah im talking abt the students. today was extremely hectic day and im not responsible. the checker and the students who appear in the examination just for the sake of passing time. everytime i started rechecking the paper,it turns out to be a big test of my nerves. first of all the stupid stupid morons who deliberately try to get themselves failed.secondly there are hell of checking mistakes in the papers. well in the beginning i pointed out every mistake but when it started getting regular. i tried to get my hands on the RED CHECKING PEN to solve the problems myself.

the girls were in a hurry,again and to my surprise two guys also made it on time. all of them busy in eating, talking and discussing electricity problems, politics and blah blah blah, really distracting for a person like me.so i started ignoring them. i heard that some guy was distributing the RED PENS there, but he never showed up on time. so i had to go down six floors,bought the pens and came back up......through stairz....:(( ironic isnt it. well i kept on working and the workers started noticing me again, i saw them giggling from the corner of my eye. well as always i dont even give a damn. thats when i realized that girls had checked all the first bundle which means no room to breath for me. i was about to get sunk in the papers again when one of the checkers came up to me and me about the superintendent.well when i called em, i got the regular answer. he wasn't going to come. DAMN IT !!

i started going through the papers and i kept on thinking the fact that y don't they all (silly students)sit at home and make my job and those similar to me, easier and more comfortable. i mean if they do such favor then it would be really convenient for us and enjoyable. well to be honest at the start of the day i knew that it was going to be ugly and it went according to its own plan.well coming back to the thing im talking about the trouble period. i lied down in my chair to take a breathe. i saw couple of people quarreling over some matter. a young man was getting out of control when the hall head guy reached there and solved the matter.

today im really pissed at my supervisor. the moron didnt show up, not only because i needed help, i needed a ride too.well after watching the drama i took a deep breath and started my work again. to be really honest, these people are fucking Egyptian history, old and pretty much out of order. i dont know how they stand themselves. cuz they are just moving their pens as fast as they can to get some extra bucks. no one cares if they have totaled correctly. i dont think they even look at the same paper again.cuz i was compelled to do on their behalf.i dont remember how many students passed,they actually failed,without even considering the option of looking it again. well thats all we can expect from these third class,low grade teachers. who get the job of teaching when they have nothing else to do.the time when they should be making a good educational base for students, they punish them and make them a psycho,like i used to be once.

now one of the checkers got my attention due to her high volume phone talk. she was laughing like a over acting clown, damn she wasn't even paying attention to the people who were looking at her in amazement. them she called somebody to whom she could discuss her daily gossips and she kept going on and on. i really wanted to leave the chair that time and eat somthing cuz i only had a sandwich in the afternoon. yeahhhhhhh !! finally the canteen guy showed up and i bought a pen and biscuit half roll. i ate and worked but the tention was increasing cuz the no. of papers left unchecked were really huge. i guess my cartoons co workers left around in the evening and the place was getting cleaned up.

its 7 on dial and im going to get out of this place. i wanna go home now. thast what i told myself angrily. im really tired, my back is pretty much similar to that of an 80year old.i gathered all my stuff and started walking. that fat guy left early i guess,i really wanted to see em. and on the last day i'll give em some dose, my special dose.

its 30th of march and i have just 25min more to write the today's proceedings, cuz LORD SHEDDING visits us at 12am. after leaving my buddies "crying" i left for the earning spot, well got there on time,as usual and called my supervisor, asked if he was there. but i got the expected answer so i decided to go CENTRAL MARKING CENTER, overcrowded as as always, i started getting insecure cuz now everyone started laying their eyes on me. i was THE YOUNGEST GUY over there, that i can confirm u. some of the gazes met mine. after landing on the 6th floor the same fat guy met me and today i attacked on him first and told him about my fixture. he kinda gave up and left. so i went to place and looked for the people i wanted to see. they werent just there,instead i saw two young ladies working in my territory. well i was kinda shocked, not that i prefer male dominace, they werent just expected. so flew over them twice, tried to recognize them. but they werent someone i knew.

After asking their id's i got to know that they were working for the same supervisor i was working for. so i sat quietly beside them,monitoring their way of checking papers and they were on fire to be really honest. they were moving their pens faster than the chase of my eye. they were just trying to kill it in one shot. i was kinda amused. i told them that i am the assistant to the head,their supervisor and their biggest nightmare for next 40 days.they werent exactly interested in my sayings so i kept my mouth shut and tried to trace my head. time to time i kept on asking them the way to do my job. they tried to help but they werent convincing so instead of embarrassing myself i preferred to wait.

i again started observing their checking style, damn they were fast and i swear to GOD, i didnt see a single paper in which they didnt fail a guy, completely. so i started recalling my time, when i was in matric. i dont know how i got passed. with that kind of checking its impossible to pass. they were hitting every ball out of the park.

i learned that i was short of 3 guys, who left earlier than my arrival. they distributed the questions and started working on them. the girls told me that it would be really hard to gather everyone everyday at same time. now that was not a good news. and then something started pinching the checkers sitting beside me. they wanted to leave early. but i didnt let them, i wanted them to meet the head. i saw the face of a checker, inflating and getting red. BUT I DIDNT EVEN GIVE A DAMN TO IT.

finally the head came and i filled out my form for assistant. i was actually disappointing to see just one slot for the assistant.it would be hard to work alone.so the head started dealing with the girls and explained their real responsibilities and then he turned for me. i started taking notes. to be really honest it really hectic. i have to control big mouth bullies without loosing my temper. they all are so senior and elder. thats what always keep me from starting a big hard discussion. my list of duties started getting long and the worst part was that i could never expect to see all the team at one time other than sunday. my list got very long. i took notes, wrote on my hand and pulled my brain for it.

then i counted the sheets, checked some papers, marked my attendance, heard some useless talking of people around me.its going to really hard tomorrow, i hope turn out well,its just day no 2.

Its 29th of march and 3pm on the dial and im waiting for my head/supervisor in the waiting area of LAHORE BOARD OFFICE ,everybody hates waiting and so do i,not becoz im guilty of being late, im just guilty of being little responsible. i remember when one of my friends Hassan Farooq told me about this internship. it seemed fascinating and really really tempting cuz of some gud bucks but the problem was that i take things really easy and simple. never try to complicate my ideas and working,keep it simple and keep it low,unless and until i have something to prove to somebody. that y im sitting over here, i gotta prove something. well i called my head for like three times and he kept on telling me to wait, wait and more wait.

im now losing some weight,not because i have eaten anything for last 6 hours but due to my brain is loosing some patience. i came here on BUS and asked 2,3 people for the address. there are some lost faces sitting in front of me, waiting for someone. alot of young people come here as far the counting of old people is concerned, damnnnn they are all over the place, now i know y the system is soo poor. well earlier i tried to search the whole place, just to pass time, on the sixth floor_where my head was supposed to meet me_ was full of so called learned people.as soon as i moved out of the lift, the fat chubby creature looked at me in disbelief. instead of escorting me to my destination he started questioning me about my reason of coming. When i tried to explain it, a grin smile appeared on his chubby face with full of sarcasm. " YR ap say nai hoga, Mushakil kam hai" and there he said that...... so underrated i was . well i went back and waited for the moron. now in the waiting area people really started noticing me,offering me help,if i was a black helpless widow who lost her son somwhere in the papers.

well there is was......as soon as my clock showed me the figure of 5. i really started getting pissed. after 15 minutes he called me and told me about his arrival. i was expecting an entourage or at least some puppy faced henchmen. but he was,alone, and drenched in his own shameful act of arriving late on scene. well i accompanied him to the sixth floor again_sharing the lift with plenty of guys bitching about their rivals. i remember once i tried to cover my ear,then tried to bite nails.....all attempts failed and just couldn't ignore their existence.

My task was simple,as i knew it already. checking over people. its pretty much like hovering over people. once they are stuck on your head, they just keep on buzzing and noticing. my head met a person who was like a new graduate, new teacher. he was showing some interest in joining the group. he took my number and promised to meet me tomorrow.well i couldn't ask for more, the plan i brought here was simple and easy, keep me hear down and do whatever is assigned.im not supposed to be loyal ,just responsible and just. my stomach really started giving me warning in form of loud alarm signals coming directly from my stomach and i really wanted to leave. i guess my supervisor wasn't interested in work either so we left. he offered me a lift_an offer i couldn't refuse_ we left and dropped on campus, from where i got a bus and got home. Damn tiring day...... !!